The OceaNyx, Somewhere At Sea, Sunday

[my_own_advocate]

There had been a brief moment at port to restock their increasingly-full pantry, but otherwise, the OceaNyx had been at sea (or at uninhabited bay) for the past few days, allowing its inhabitants to find some kind of peace. It had been helpful, at least for Lucifer, whose strong emotions towards both of his partners - anger, for Duke, worry, for Octavia - had finally settled back down. Allowing him to be in the moment.

Admittedly, 'the moment' involved a lot of cooking in the ship's incredibly tiny kitchen - how he'd managed to wrench that many cookies out of that oven was anyone's guess - but still.

It was a nice day. The climate was certainly growing warmer, as they moved further south. And so Lucifer eventually exited the kitchen to find a spot on some cushions near the back, enjoying the sight of the wind in the ship's sails, the way it bent slightly sideways as it made speed, the sound of the bow cutting through the water.

Why couldn't it be like this all the time?

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Comments

[okteiviakom]

Octavia shook her head, just a little. "Panic doesn't listen to reason," she muttered. "Especially when... I could also see the reason in considering it failure."

[my_own_advocate]

"Let me rephrase, then," Lucifer murmured. "Please don't do this to you on my account. You are enough for me."

[okteiviakom]

"I guess it just... wasn't always like that for me," Octavia hazarded, slowly and quietly. "My worth didn't work like that."

Yet more to talk to her therapist about.

Eventually.

[my_own_advocate]

"How did it work?" Lucifer asked gently.

[okteiviakom]

Octavia looked down towards her lap.

"If I cared for other people no matter what it did to me, I had worth." It was a simplification, but it wasn't incorrect. "And if I failed..."

[my_own_advocate]

"There was something wrong with you?" Lucifer guessed.

[okteiviakom]

And Octavia shook her head. Went almost wry.

"I had no worth at all."

[my_own_advocate]

"Oh," Lucifer said quietly.

[okteiviakom]

"It's much easier to fall back to that than I thought," Octavia murmured. "If the stakes are high enough."

[my_own_advocate]

"Oh, darling," Lucifer whispered.

His arm slid around her again. He hugged her tight.

[okteiviakom]

"Do you think Duke would be impressed he's as high stakes as the... fate of humanity?"

It wasn't a genuine question. More of a weak mumble of a questionable joke, if anything.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer snorted softly. "He should be."

[okteiviakom]

Octavia just leaned more heavily against him.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer sighed, and ran his hand over her hair.

"You are always worth everything to me," he said softly.

[okteiviakom]

"I wish to be."

Sometimes had a hard time believing it.

[my_own_advocate]

"You are," Lucifer murmured.

He didn't expect that to work, but it still... bore repeating.

[okteiviakom]

What it seemed to mostly do was make Octavia give in to the urge to fully embrace him back.

With the vibe that she would've curled up in his lap if it had been possible.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer smiled and sank into the hug anyway. They could always... move this somewhere horizontal if needed be.

"Just be with me, darling," he said softly. "Keep a little of yourself, don't give it all away, because I like it in the package it is currently in."

[okteiviakom]

"I'm trying," Octavia mumbled.

As far as promises went, it wasn't her best one.

[my_own_advocate]

"I know."

Lucifer pressed a kiss into her neck.

[okteiviakom]

Octavia made a weak noise, like a protest.

As if she didn't also just lean into him more. She contained multitudes.

[my_own_advocate]

"And I will always be here to encourage you," Lucifer said quietly. "Even when you are lost."

[okteiviakom]

That did things. Inside Octavia's chest.

Her voice sounded tight.

"Can we... can we go just lay down for a while?"

[my_own_advocate]

"Of course," Lucifer murmured. "Come on, then."

He kept as much of a hold on her as he could, while he rose.

[okteiviakom]

It was a little awkward, getting up like that, but Octavia welcomed it.

It wasn't like she didn't want to keep clinging to him, anyway.