The Pier on Cat Island, Monday Morning

[my_own_advocate]

Well, nothing had gone catastrophically wrong since Duke left yesterday. Octavia and Lucifer had taken their portal, and found themselves standing immediately in the sunshine. Whatever burdens had laid on Lucifer's shoulders, many of them sloughed off at the sight of the sand and the surf.

Sometimes he missed Los Angeles, still. The beach helped. And while the temperatures could have been higher, they were comfortable, much more so than Fandom. So he had stretched, and set up the Fin and Tonic for inhabitation for the next few weeks, and that had been all.

And now he was here. Sitting on the edge of their pier, a pina colada in one hand, wearing a swimsuit that didn't quite aspire to the heights (or lows) of Eric's small speedos, his legs kicking idly over the water. There was a peace here he was desperate to embrace. He could only hope Octavia could find a fraction of it, as well.

(And Duke, out there on his boat, processing his demons.)

[[ open for phone calls and she who is here ]]

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[okteiviakom]

Octavia didn't have as much of an iron grip on him anymore, but it still took her a moment to let him move.

But she did.

And she allowed him to tug her in, too, slumping a little against his side.

[my_own_advocate]

"I'm so sorry, darling," Lucifer murmured, pressing his face into her hair.

[okteiviakom]

Octavia made a frustrated noise and tried to nuzzle at his neck.

"It's like --" she started, only to cut herself off, and made another grumbly noise.

[my_own_advocate]

"Yes?" Lucifer prompted gently.

[okteiviakom]

Octavia's voice was considerably more quiet when she finally answered.

And... defeated.

"I feel like I don't even know him."

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer frowned. "Howso?" he asked gently.

[okteiviakom]

"I don't know, everything just feels so... unpredictable," Octavia muttered, after a short moment of silently groping for words. "Like the landscape's shifted. And now I don't know where it's safe to walk anymore."

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer let out a soft huff. "Sounds familiar," he murmured. "But... yes, after the talk I had with him, I can see how you would feel that way."

[okteiviakom]

Octavia nodded faintly against his shoulder. Or whatever part of him that happened to be.

"And I know I have no room to complain," she added. "Think I might've been worse."

It was hard for her to remember much in the way of details about a lot of the first couple of years after her return.

[my_own_advocate]

"We learned the hard way when to give you space and when to take it," Lucifer said softly. "Because you couldn't really tell us. You could often only react."

[okteiviakom]

"Yeah," Octavia said.

It was a quiet sigh of a word.

"Exactly."

[my_own_advocate]

"I think that's where he's at right now," Lucifer said pensively. "He's mostly reacting and can't bloody tell us why or what for, exactly."

[okteiviakom]

"I don't know how to do this," Octavia admitted.

Although she suspected that much might have already been abundantly clear.

[my_own_advocate]

"I know," Lucifer said quietly. "It goes against your instincts. But I promise you, he's still Duke."

[okteiviakom]

"But which one?"

She'd still been Octavia, too. But not the same Octavia.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer's mouth curved wryly. "I think we may have to find out."

[okteiviakom]

Something caught in Octavia's throat again, like she started saying something but immediately just... didn't.

She felt like she was doing that a lot, lately. Holding things back.

[my_own_advocate]

He saw it, though.

"Octavia?"

[okteiviakom]

Octavia hesitated some more.

Then she muttered, "I'm... worried."

That didn't feel like the right word. But it was one she could live with.

[my_own_advocate]

"What about?"

[okteiviakom]

Octavia's voice was staying very quiet, now. She tried to make it mild, too, but the... worry broke through.

"What if this version ends up thinking... that I'm too much to deal with?"

And quieter, more mumbly still.

"Or the other way around."

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer's expression softened. "Oh, love," he said.

[okteiviakom]

"That's not a reassuring answer."

As far as jokes went, that was... really too weak to qualify.

(But maybe Octavia deserved some slack because she now hated that she'd shared that in the first place.)

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer kissed her cheek. Tried to pull her in even tighter. "I'm sorry," he murmured. "We have been through worse with one another. You have been much worse. And we were still here, in the end. He loves you, as I have loved you, through all your worst things. And you love him, and you're worried because you do."

Because losing him would be terrifying.

"But I think this too will pass," he said. "I think he's difficult right now because he's moving, not because he's arrived. So to speak."

[okteiviakom]

"But for how long?"

She was aware he wasn't going to have a answer for her. She was just... allowing the feeling out.